Woody Allen

Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of meat and potatoes, comedy is rather the dessert, a bit like meringue.

Woody Allen

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.

Woody Allen

Culturally speaking, I was raised in a Jewish household. In addition to the religious side of it, I was taught respect for books and learning and the higher professions like medicine and law and teaching.

Woody Allen

Curiosity, that’s what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It’s our own hearts and minds.

Woody Allen

Cynicism is reality with an alternate spelling.

Woody Allen

Dear Mom and Dad, Leave $50,000 in a bag under the bridge on Decatur Street. If there is no bridge on Decatur Street, please build one.

Woody Allen

Death is an acquired trait.

Woody Allen

Death should not be seen as the end but as a very effective way to cut down expenses.

Woody Allen

Does art imitate life, or does life imitate TV?

Woody Allen

Doing abominations is against the law, particularly if the abominations are done while wearing a lobster bib.

Woody Allen