Woody Allen

And my parents finally realize I’m kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They rent out my room.

Woody Allen

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.

Woody Allen

As a boy, I was ashamed to wear glasses. I memorized the eye chart, and then on the test they asked essay questions.

Woody Allen

As I got more confident, I was able to let actors improvise, and do long takes. It’s 10%, 5% you learn and experience. The rest you just have or you don’t have.

Woody Allen

As the author you know how you want it to appear on screen and it’s always the content dictating the form.

Woody Allen

Astronomers say the universe is finite, which is a comforting thought for those people who can’t remember where they leave things.

Woody Allen

At the trial Stubbs chose to act as his own lawyer, but a conflict over his fee led to ill feelings.

Woody Allen

Basically I am a low-culture person. I prefer watching baseball with a beer and some meatballs.

Woody Allen

Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in my bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.

Woody Allen

Be alert. The world needs more lerts.

Woody Allen