Mark Twain

I have been cautioned to talk but be careful not to say anything. I do not consider this a difficult task.

Mark Twain

I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough.

Mark Twain

I have carried a revolver; lots of us do, but they are the most innocent things in the world.

Mark Twain

I have criticized absent people so often, and then discovered, to my humiliation, that I was talking with their relatives, that I have grown superstitious about that sort of thing and dropped it.

Mark Twain

I have done more for San Francisco than any of its old residents. Since I left there it has increased in population fully 300,000. I could have done more – I could have gone earlier – it was suggested.

Mark Twain

I have learned that human existence is essentially tragic. It is only the love of God, disclosed and enacted in Christ, that redeems the human tragedy and makes it tolerable. No, more than tolerable. Wonderful.

Mark Twain

I have made it a rule never to smoke more that one cigar at a time.

Mark Twain

I have never seen what to me seemed an atom of proof that there is a future life. And yet-I am inclined to expect one.

Mark Twain

I have never taken any exercise, except sleeping and resting, and I never intend to take any.

Mark Twain

I have no race prejudices, and I think I have no color prejudices or caste prejudices nor creed prejudices. Indeed I know it. I can stand any society. All that I care to know is that a man is a human being-that is enough for me; he can’t be any worse.

Mark Twain