Ellen DeGeneres

True beauty is not related to what color your hair is or what color your eyes are. True beauty is about who you are as a human being, your principles, your moral compass.

Ellen DeGeneres

We all feel like idiots at one time or another. Even if we feel we’re cool 98 percent of the time, that 2-percent doofus is poised to take over our bodies without any warning.

Ellen DeGeneres

When your heart is broken, when your heart has cracks in it, it lets the light in.

Ellen DeGeneres

A kid should be told that you can have feelings.

Ellen DeGeneres

All we have is here and now. That’s why procrastination feels so right. Procrastination isn’t the problem, it’s the solution.

Ellen DeGeneres

Asking who’s the ‘man’ and who’s the ‘woman’ in a same-sex relationship is like asking which chopstick is the fork.

Ellen DeGeneres

At a four-way stop sign, the person with the prettiest eyes has the right of way.

Ellen DeGeneres

Baloney is just salami with an inferiority complex.

Ellen DeGeneres

Be kind to one another.

Ellen DeGeneres

Beauty is not between a size 0 and a size 8. It’s not a number at all.

Ellen DeGeneres